Today's Random Thoughts
- Admin
- Apr 20, 2018
- 2 min read
There's a photo saved to my computer of me like this, except way more terrifying. I got drunk on facebook live one night. I honestly don't recall it at all, in fact, the only reason I know I did it, is because I woke up to so many messages of the still image and of emojis, that were laughing so hard they were crying. I deleted the video right away without watching, and honestly looking back, I wish I would've saved that train wreck! I'm sure I will have many more "train wreck moments," ahead, cause, well, that's just what it takes to live.
I used to be such a scared, good girl when I was younger. I had a lot of messed up shit happen, I kept believing it would all get better, but I never dealt with it. Not dealing with all my pain, sweeping everything under the rug, turned me into the woman I became. I tried to love people with my guard up higher than space. I always expected the worse, so much, that I believed they would eventually, intentionally hurt me, if they hadn't already.
People are disappointing, but man are they addictive. I love finding people, where I legit bond with their soul. It's intoxicating when you're on the same wave length, when you both have had shitty pasts, but are still here. People that know life can be shit, but is also amazing and beautiful. People that know dark times, and don't judge yours. People who have experienced the negatives, so they only praise the positives. People who know who they are and instead of wasting time pointing out other people's flaws, they focus on strengthening themselves.
Those are my people.
Oh, and people that love dogs.
Like I mentioned before in my previous article, my 20's were just my selfish time, wasted on shitty relationships and bad decisions. I've experienced being treated like shit and I've also experienced being a piece of shit. Yes, I was that girl that had people do bad shit to me and instead of working through it, I decided to become a shitty person as well. To tell you the truth, being a shitty person isn't for me. Thank goodness I had a wake up call, which I will tell you guys about at a later time. Actually, I had multiple. It was just time to choose, either continually be a piece of shit, or change.
That's it, those are the decisions you have when things go wrong. You can either accept that's all you're going to amount to and be that type of person, or you can change from that moment on. Change to be better, to do better, to live your life and deal with pain when it happens.
Today's Random Thoughts
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