Why I stayed quiet during the "Marines United Nude scandal."
- Admin
- Jul 20, 2018
- 6 min read
Back then I was still an admin of a facebook group called “Page 11,” we were always interacting with our members, it was a really entertaining time, to say the least. Of course, when you’re having a good time, people like to ruin it or hate on you because you caught other people’s attention.
I could feel it, Page 11 was going to be something. IT had the vibe of a barracks setting, but online. People gave each other shit, but all in good fun. WE had games to play that kept our members interacting all the time. The more interaction, the more our posts were viewed, and the more people joined. We were becoming pretty well known in the “veteran community.”
Downside of the "Veteran Community?" There are a set of sad people that aren't doing shit anymore, can't find a new purpose, so they try and break others down, that high school mentality. Instead of "My parents buy me nicer clothes than yours so I can make fun of you," it's "My MOS (military job,) is better than yours." That's their reasoning for tearing other members of the community down. Like Drake said in 'Emotionless,' "most times it's just someone that's alone and afraid."
I can’t attest to what "Marines United facebook group," really was created for, or the camaraderie that came from it. I can attest, though, that there were some people apart of it, some I knew, that were dead set on making my life hell. Not only that, but in an absolutely insecure and immature way, they were upset that our group was doing better than theirs.
I got messages sent to me saying “this person said this about you,” or “they are blasting your name in their group.”
I really felt the bullying, becoming an admin of a growing group apparently puts a target on your back, especially if you’re a female. I was always venting to my select friends about the stresses of admining a facebook group and all the drama that came with it. I didn’t really let it get to me too hard, except when people, I thought I was cool with, started talking shit. My circle definitely began to decrease, and I was okay with it. I still had great camaraderie with every admin in that group, and they were always very encouraging in their own ways. It was a good team.
None of the shit talking really got to me, until I got the dreaded message I’m sure ANYONE would hate to get. “Your nudes are online.”
“WHAT!?!” WHERE?” I freaked out with anxiety.
It was on tumblr at the time, Can’t remember the name, but something to do with females in the military. Any dude that had nudes from his chick, he sent them there, it was LEGIT disgusting… the worst part? Most of these girls didn’t even know! The same dudes that were telling their woman they loved and cherished them, they were sharing parts of them to strangers for kicks and brownie points. My heart was fucking crushed. I was so let down, someone I shared photos with in confidence, and still to this day doesn’t admit it was him, posted my private photos for everyone to see. I felt so fucking alone. Until the story broke out, then it just got worse. Some dudes I thought were my friends would message me and say "hey, saw your nudes, those are nice," or "you shouldn't be upset they were shared, you look good." It kept getting worse.
Then I saw people I was friends with blaming the girls who took the photos in the first place, for sharing them in confidence. I WAS SHOCKED. I didn’t want to say a word, especially after what happened with all the bullying following page 11 admin time. People picked their sides, and whoever came forward as a “victim,” was blasted on other pages and labeled as disgusting and laughed at.
This all was shitty. Having people talk about you in the worst way possible, not only to other people, but online, it fucking hurts. Having my private photos shared for the world to see. Even more fucked up they linked my social media accounts to these photos, so no surprise there that I was constantly getting bombarded with dick pics in my inbox on the daily. And receiving more messages like “send me naked photos,” “Hey, sorry about your nudes getting shared, well, I’m not sorry, cause I’m glad I got to see them, lol.” ALL of this shit hurt, I was absolutely disgusted, the worst part of all, was when I saw who was saying some of it.
A brother, who had confided in me during a really dark time, told me he couldn’t turn to his other friends because he didn’t want them to think he was weak. He talked to me about suicide and not having purpose, and I was fucking there for him! I listened, and told him I’d always be there for him, no matter what.
One day, as i was combing one of the screen shots I got sent, I was reading through the comments and his name caught my eye. I legit started crying, he confided in me during his darkest time, and yet here he was, happily joining others in burning me during one of my darkest times. AND not even to my face, behind my fucking back. Of course he had to add in that “I almost married this girl,” dude… if you are reading this right now, shame on you. I was there for you, and this is your repayment. It was shitty, but I want you to know, I forgive you.
The awkward part? I didn’t say anything, or come forward. Yet, I had news media BBC contact me on twitter asking if I’d like to give an interview. When I thought back, they could’ve found my twitter was from the awesome people that posted my nudes on the “inon b” (or whatever its called) website with my twitter handle on it. I left them on read, I just wasn’t ready to have sides form, and it would’ve. It still saddens me that people say it’s the victims fault. It’s not your fault they were shared for everyone to see, it’s your fault for trusting someone.
BBC if you’re reading this, which you’re probably not because it’s not a “popular,” discussion anymore, but here’s your answer on how I feel.
No offense to my fellow dudes that are doing amazing things and treating people with respect, but the whole incident, made me lose faith in my fellow man. Still to this day I get messages like: “You’re posted up again,” or, “have you ever thought about charging for them?” I just don’t get anxious over it anymore. I know there’s nothing that can be done. There are always going to be those people who get away with shit, or give the excuse that someone deserves this type of behavior.
If your private photos have be posted publicly without your approval, I am sorry, and you’ve been wronged.
My advice? Just keep living your life. Obviously if it can be made right, pursue that, but other than that, don’t let these motherfuckers hold you back or keep you quiet. I’ve legit seen people post, if I left Page 11, no more photos would be posted, or If I do something for them, they’ll take them down. Nah, if you want to gain fame off of me, that’s on you homie, I don’t play the blackmail game. I’m still going to be the happy, go lucky, hard working, kick ass mom that I have been, congrats if you saw me at my lowest, just keep watching.
I am no longer apart of Page 11, not because of the haters.
I just realized that I needed to invest all of my time in me and my empire I want to grow! I want to use my platform to help people. I want to show people through my story how shit happens, but you will still be here, pursuing the best version of you. If your past is what's holding you back, people are hanging your past mistakes over your head or you feel you don't deserve success, I've been there, I used to believe what the negative people told me. Let me tell you, They are wrong, even the one in your head that tells you, you don't deserve the world. You do. Act like it and go after it, even if everyone else gives up on you, make sure, you never do.
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